November 1, 2011

The Shorter End Of The Stick

Shorter University, a Baptist university in Rome, Georgia, decided last week to begin requiring its employees to sign a "personal lifestyle pledge."  Among other promises, the pledge includes the promise that an employee will "reject homosexuality."

Shorter's president, Dr. Don V. Dowless, says that teachers and administrators who don't sign the pledge could lose their jobs:  "I think that anybody that adheres to a lifestyle outside of what the biblical mandate is would not be allowed to continue here." Adhering.  Like tape?  Like red tape?

The university already has gay employees (I know this because some of them have anonymously contacted the press).  Surprise!  They're everywhere!!!  Part of the gay agenda is infiltration into all corners of America, even into the unsavory parts.  Once there, they hide out, sweating big bullets and living in fear of discovery.  They work, pay taxes, buy redleaf lettuce at the grocery store, sing show tunes on the sly, and practice straighter ways to walk.  Straight and narrow does it.

Dr. Dowless has only been president of Shorter University since June 1st of this year.  My best guess is that the witch hunt began on June 2nd but I'm only using my common sense coupled with an astute sense of cynicism.  Dowless can lead Shorter University in whichever direction he wants . . . for brand-new employees.  Flushing out existing employees using a new policy and a new pledge is problematic, for me and for those employees. Dowless can chase off all the bright new job applicants that he wishes to from here on out.  His loss.

But remember the infiltration plan.  Every gay chased away from Shorter will eventually resurface, pushing a grocery cart in your hometown.  Just when you thought it was safe to buy lettuce.  

For a slightly different take along a similar vein:  "Setting The Bar."


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